Life has been quite peaceful lately. Well…actually life has been unpredictable and full of curveballs since I last wrote, so it’s more like I’ve been peaceful. Up until now, my living space has always been littered with to-do lists and little slips of papers with scribbles of reminders. I have a habit of writing down every little thing in fear of forgetting things and I’d get overwhelmed if I didn’t have things noted somewhere. This was meant to help me, not stress me out, yet it’s always done the exact opposite.
Lately though, I’ve been catching myself remembering things that I had neglected to annotate and actually being pretty chill about it. Besides a few reminders on my iPhone, I haven’t been keeping any to-do lists and such. And for some reason, this change didn’t hit me until a few days ago. I realize that my need to keep track of every little detail stemmed from my need to be in control. As if everything I needed to do and get done wouldn’t get done if I didn’t have it written down on a piece of paper. It sounds trivial, but this change in habit has led me to feel more peaceful. And I didn’t even realize I was making a change!
I’m living more in the moment now, rather than future tripping. I’ll write down important things that I know I can’t forget to do, but besides those few things, I live life more presently now. I get to things when I get to them at the perfect time they’re meant to be gotten to. Plus, ironically enough, I’m more likely to accomplish things sooner that in the past I would have procrastinated on, since I knew it was annotated for future reference. Makes no sense, eh?
Anyway, as I said, I’ve been quite peaceful lately. I don’t try to control things as much and trust that things will be just fine without my incessant scribbles everywhere. Sounds simple, doesn’t it? As I get older, I notice more and more just how simple life can be if you only let it.